In English:
Auf Deutsch:
на русском языке:
En español:
November 2011
Dear Participants of the Online Class, “Singing the…Song of the Plumed Serpent: Dreaming a New Story for Now, 2012 and Beyond:”
What a delight to be with you from all around the world and share with you the transformative gift of the Plumed Serpent – the ability to change our perception of seemingly ordinary scenes and ‘stories’ from our lives into luminous events!
We would love to hear from you and invite you to share after class:
- Your experiences of the class;
- The practice of The Plumed Serpent form and other Magical Passes;
- The tracking of an initial scene of ‘disagreement’ and the turning of it into an entirely different story – one from the perspective of a larger view and a compassionate heart.
- The finding of your own ‘tone’ – one in connection with your dreaming body and Spirit.
Additionally, seven days after this class, we would love to hear:
- Of your explorations of reading/saying to yourself – your new view of the other person in your scene, yourself and your new story – at least once a day, and then your observations of how this ‘new story’ altered your mood and follow-up interactions with this person.
- And how singing your ‘tone’ to yourself or out loud daily, in times of peace and in times when a broader view was needed, gave you a new perspective.
We look forward to seeing you at our next web class – December 10th 2011.
Affectionately,
Cleargreen
November 2011
Liebe Teilnehmer des Online Kurses “Das Singen….des Liedes der Gefiederten Schlange: Eine neue Geschichte träumen für jetzt, 2012 und darüber hinaus:”
Was für eine Freude mit euch allen überall auf der Welt zusammen zu sein, und mit euch das Veränderung bringende Geschenk der Gefiederten Schlange zu teilen – die Fähigkeit unsere Wahrnehmung von vermeintlich alltäglichen Szenen und ‘Geschichten’ unseres Lebens zu verändern und sie in lichterfüllte Ereignisse zu verwandeln!
Wir würden gerne im Anschluß an den Kurs eure Mitteilung erfahren zu Folgendem:
- Eure Erfahrung mit dem Kurs;
- Das Ausüben der Form der Gefiederten Schlange und anderer magischer Bewegungen;
- Das Verfolgen einer Szene die ursprünglich ‘Uneinigkeit’ beinhaltete und ihre Verwandlung in eine völlig andere Geschichte – eine mit einer erweiterten Sicht und mitfühlendem Herzen.
- Das Finden des eigenen ‘Tones’ – einem der mit dem Traumköper und dem Geist verbunden ist.
Dann, sieben Tage nach dem Kurs, würden wir gerne noch Weiteres von euch hören:
- Und zwar über eure Erfahrung damit, wie ihr euch selbst mindestens einmal täglich Folgendes vorlest/sagt – die neue Sicht auf die andere Person in der Szene, die neue Sicht auf euch selbst und eure neue Geschichte – und dann eure Beobachtungen darüber, wie diese ‘neue Geschichte’ eure Stimmung und die folgenden Interaktionen mit dieser Person verändert hat.
- Und wie das tägliche Singen eures ‘Tones’, leise vor euch hin, oder laut heraus, in Augenblicken der Ruhe, aber auch in solchen in denen eine erweitere Sicht notwendig ist, euch eine neue Perspektive gezeigt hat.
Wir freuen uns euch in unserem nächsten WebEx Kurs zu sehen – 10. Dezember 2011.
Zugeneigt,
Cleargreen
Ноябрь 2011
Дорогие Участники онлайн класса, “Поём…Песню Пернатого Змея:
Сновидение Новой Истории на этот момент, 2012 год и дальше:”
Какое удовольствие быть с вместе вами, участниками со всего мира, и разделить с вами дар трансформации Пернатого Змея – способность менять наше восприятие кажущихся обычными сцен и “историй” из наших жизней в светящиеся события!
Мы хотели бы услышать от вас и приглашаем поделиться следующим после этого класса:
- Каким был опыт участия в классе для вас;
- Форма Пернатого Змея и другие магические пассы;
- Отслеживание первой сцены “несогласия” и ее перенастройка в совершенно другую историю – с восприятием из расширенного взгляда и сочувствующего сердца.
- Нахождение вашей собственной “музыки” – из связи со своим телом сновидения и Духом.
Также через семь дней после класса мы хотели бы услышать от вас:
- О ваших исследованиях – как вы зачитываете/говорите себе ваш новый взгляд на другого человека в вашей сцене, на самих себя и вашу новую историю – по крайней мере один раз в день, и затем о ваших наблюдениях – как эта “новая история” меняет ваше настроение и последующие взаимодействия с этим человеком.
- И как пение этой музыки про себя или вслух, каждый день, в моменты спокойствия и когда вам нужен расширенный взгляд, дает вам новое видение.
Ждем новой встречи с вами на нашем следующем веб-классе – в 10 декабря 2011г.
С любовью,
Cleargreen
Noviembre 2011
Queridos Participantes de la Clase en Línea, “Cantando la….Canción de la Serpiente Emplumada: Ensoñando para Ahora una Nueva Historia, para el 2011 y Más Allá:”
Es delicioso estar con ustedes desde todas las partes del mundo y compartirles el regalo de transformación de la Serpiente Emplumada – la habilidad de cambiar nuestra percepción de las escenas e “historias” aparentemente ordinarias de nuestras vidas en ¡eventos luminosos!.
Nos encantaría escucharlos e invitarlos a que compartan después de la clase:
- Sus experiencias de la clase
- La práctica de la forma de la Serpiente Emplumada y otros Pases Mágicos;
- El rastreo inicial de una escena de “desacuerdo” y el convertirla en una historia completamente diferente – desde la perspectiva de una vista más amplia y un corazón compasivo.
- El encuentro con su propio “tono” – uno en conexión con su cuerpo de ensueño y con el Espíritu.
Adicionalmente, siete días después de la clase, nos encantaría escuchar:
- De sus exploraciones de leerse/decirse a ustedes mismos – su nueva vista de la otra persona y de ustedes mismos en la escena y su nueva historia – al menos una vez al día, y luego sus observaciones de cómo esta “nueva historia” alteró su ánimo y sus interacciones subsiguientes con esta persona.
- Y como el cantarse diariamente su “tono” para ustedes mismos o en voz fuerte, en momentos de paz y en momentos cuando se necesitaba una vista más amplia, les dio una nueva perspectiva.
Esperamos con gusto encontrarlos en nuestra próxima clase en línea el 10 de Diciembre de 2011.
Afectuosamente,
Cleargreen
cleargreendreaming
Thank you so much for the class, beautiful!
My scene was:
Working with a colleague, he suggested some actions to move forward the project we both are involved in. I got even angry at what he was proposing as I thought it was not following the correct steps.
My story about him was that he hasn’t got a clue of what he’s doing
My story about myself was that there is a lot to organise and we’re not doing well, I feel not capable for the task.
My new view (the last new view of the exercise):
We are two beings standing there in that time and space, two luminous beings. The situation, my reaction, my worry that we’re heading the wrong direction, is nearly insignificant; I can see us like pure energy, shine and full of magic!
My story about him Now is that he’s a beautiful being, shiny and magical, he is action, he wants to move thing forward.
My story about myself Now is that I’m also a beautiful being, light and magical, I can feel that my heart is my centre, is the driving force. I am able to direct my intent, as I’m connected with my Energy Body and with Spirit to move things forward as well. I can be relaxed and have no fear, I can collaborate with him.
The story Re-written:
I’m with my colleague and as he suggests his actions to move forward, I calmly listen to him and sweetly suggest to start putting things down in a piece of paper so we can both see how it flows and whether it’ll fit with the tools and methods we’re supposed to use. And so we start writing the flow of the activity down, we can easily identify what is missing, we can agree on actions to complete, and we even write dates down of when we’re going to do it. We both move forward and push in the same direction. The energy flows between us.
Amazing transformation!
Thank you for this calm and profound class, for providing the space and instructions to lead us to experience our connection with our energybody. I very much liked the possibility of half an hour introduction at the beginning of the class.
The moment during the class, when I saw the new story with closed eyes, I felt like discovering anew, what really had happened, as if the story, I had remembered at the beginning, has only been a fragmentary and narrow memory of the original scene. After practicing the Magical Passes of the Plumed Serpent, I felt that what I see is “truer” and “more alive, more energetic”, and the way I saw the other people and myself is also “truer” and “more alive, more energetic”.
The story which came to my mind happened, when I was about 5 years old. I am lying in my bed, sharing a room with my 1 year younger brother. It is nighttime and my parents are having a party in our party room in the cellar. I cannot sleep because of the loud music and the smell of wine and beer.
And my story about my parents and their friends is that “They should not have this party and they are making myself and my brother suffer.”
My story about myself is that “They are making me suffer and I cannot do anything to feel better. I feel like a victim”.
With the practice of the Magical Passes of introduction and the Plumed Serpent Pass, I felt that I became more aware of the sensations inside of my body, as to the slow speed and the practice with closed eyes, which I liked a lot, and for me, the Plumed Serpent Pass brings a mood of joy, flexibility and courage, while being connected with the earth.
With this more vibrant and open body position, my new story about the people in the scene changed to: the house is vibrating with music, laughter, lightness and joy. My parents and their friends love to dance, to feel light and let go. They use all their energy to enjoy themselves at this moment.
My new story about myself: I am lying in my bed. My brother does not seem to be as disturbed, as I am, and I feel the night as magic, profound and beautiful. I smile and share my parent’s and their friends laughter, lightness.
Dreaming the story anew: I get up and put a dress on, go down into the party room and tell my mother, that I will dance a while with them and then go to my grandmother’s house, next to my parent’s house, to sleep the rest of the night there.
Although this story happened decades of years ago, the moment I received this view with my eyes closed, I felt like I am recovering a knowledge, I always had! I understand now the cite of Don Juan or a seer of his group, saying: Energy knows only the NOW, is an eternal and always present NOW.
By singing the sounds, all together and each of us, the knowledge that I am not a solid being, in the first place, becomes palpable, inside of myself and at the same time, I perceive more clearly a vast connection with all of you created by the waves of sound…
Hi together
Already preparing for this Webex class for the group has brought some very interesting insights to how a group functions …. or not. My companions wanted to join this time and they said it several times, but none of them did. So again I was the only one who joined this class from here.
Focussing on tensegrity in the last weeks and months also brought some powerfull insights to me and helped me manage my life. So looking on three special moments I had this year, this class and the exercise of going through these stories helped get more calm and peaceful and took out some of the “tragedy” of my stories. Still, what happened to me has a very deep impact to my life, but now I am in peace with it, make my decisions and go on, without any anger to the situation and the person involved.
This version of the Quetzlacoatl seems to me more “air-ish” than the version I already knew from Mexico this year. Energy is lighter and feels to me more tending upwards. So I feel much more lifted up. Since the class I use it regularly through my working days, whenever I feel too much grounded, to free me and my brain again and I feel I can concentrate better after this magical pass.
Finding the tone after the magical pass was for me more difficult and I am not sure, if i got it. I repeated the form and the singing after the class and was singing for some time. I went through different tones and feelings, finding me more centered, but also somehow sad, without knowing why. In the night I dreamed a lot about this singing and about the stories I stalked in the class. And even now – three days later – I find myself regularly hanging in my thoughts with these stories.
It is a deep experience and a very cleansing way to look at what happened to me.
Thank you to Cleargreen and the Instructors for this class, for the help and support.
I really liked the class. I was impressed to see so many people (from around the world) happily involved in the practice. It was really refreshing.
I don’t have enough experience over a long period of practice to comment on the magical passes yet. At a purely physical level my circulation and fitness has improved over the short time I’ve been doing Tensegrity.
The initial scene of disagreement related to a friend at work. I wanted a positive response to one of my jokes and she didn’t oblige! When I changed the scene and considered her point of view, I wasn’t as attached to her response. I changed the interpretation of her response from a position where ‘she was intentionally not obliging me’ to one where ‘there were other things on her mind’ (which is probably true!). The overall effect was a more relaxed and considerate feeling where I don’t fret over the responses of others if they are not up to laughing at my jokes!
Thank you all for Saturday’s class. I find this form very easy to remember and practise on a daily basis.
I have found that this form allows me to capture inappropriately deployed energy from situations in my past bringing it back to my core. This allows me to actually change the source of all creation in my universe….Me.
This appropriately re-deployed energy is now available for future use when called upon and gives support to its instant and pragmatic use.
Thanks again
I love the snake movements. They make me calm and aware.
My scene:
I was fourteen and on vacation with my good friend and her grandparents. On the very last day the grandfather came to me and shouted at me that I more than once insulted my friend with what I said (I was very sarcastic at that time). They would not take me with them to dinner and I should stay in my room. Moreover he would tell my father about what I did when he would fetch me.
During the session I could turn this scene completely. At the end I felt, that this person was a wonderful luminous being and that I am shining brightly, too. I was calm and detached from all the emotions that initially came up. My ego plays a game and I’m still practicing to lead it in the game.
The tone i firstly sang was a ‘u’ in a higher level. The longer I held it the more it changed into a tone that seemed to come out of infinity. I felt I became wider and wider until I wasn’t only a separated being anymore…
Dear Instructors,
My scene is:
I am standing in front of a desk near the entrance of the emergency service, where the patients were first wellcomed and recorded. I am talking with some collegues who are standing behind the desk. It is a nice and short talk but I want to stop talking and go to my room.
I got face to face with my old problem. Not knowing how to stop a talk with people who are not my friends, without disturbance or unkindness. I look around , I gasp and try to change my body positions.My internal dialogue is:”my mind is blank” “I want to leave”
I make shifts in my body positions to find a last word fitting to the situation to finish talking but instead, our talk gets deeper and closer.
After the first Plummed Serpent Form:
My internal dialogue changes:
“Okay, nice to talk, but certainly there is a distance between myself and the persons with whom I talk.” ” I have nothing to talk with those people” remembering some past negative impressions and interactions with them.
I also concurrently think ” I am empty” “I have nothing to give” in face of their interest.” “I would not like to be there” “I am just suffering of a general insufficiency.”
I take a deep breath :” The other persons are not important. Being closer to them doesn’t create any drawback.”
I get an insight about the whole situation: “That’s my general nervousness. ‘My capacity to create problems’ – I mean the tendency to find a problem in everything – is in charge now. Together with this , my blankness is an expression of an obsessive unsafety.
I get another series of thoughts:
“I must get rid of this ‘subtle’ fear that shakes my legs” “I must get rid of this ‘cold focus’ inside of me” Except these two (fear and coldness) I am perfect.”
New scene is: I play a strange game which is not completely in favour of myself.
It was here, I guess, we repeated the form again.
My new thoughts about the other persons in the scene: “They like working with me.They are less stressfull while working with me.”
My new thoughts about myself: ” Of course I am not empty.” ” I know and follow the stories of people with whom I work closely, with great attention, sympathy and understanding.
New Scene: I look around, knowing that I am afraid of facing a serious problem at work, I say to people behind the desk “Let’s see if we can get over the day” and walk to my room without any disturbance in me about people at the desk.
At one point in our online class, while looking around fearfully near the desk, I was also fearing of a whole life -past and now- and worriying about being insufficient against its challenges. Then I experienced a view or a mood which I named immediately as something like “vibrational confidence or purposefullness” but forgot immediately. What was left with me was that ” We (you) are doing such a great work there that it is just pity and sad that I withhold my full affection, appreciation”.
At the end of the last form , I remembered this mood again, for a few minutes , which was a convincing and satisfaying antidot for my insecure stand in life.
That night, while normally I don’t even remember my dreams, I noticed that I am asleep and I see myself walking in a street. The dream was like a vague thought as usual. When I got aware that it was a dream, I saw a turning point in front of me, or in the middle of the scene. It was like the turning points at the beginnings of youtube videos I looked at it and suddenly I found myself walking in a very clear dream, walking again, I think, in the same street. I walked for a while, went side ways without looking directly at anything. Then, because of everything was so real, I started to think and concluded that it was not a dream and I didn’t know why I thought that it was a dream. The dream finished there. When I woke up in the morning I remembered that dream quite clearly, but it was black and white and not colorful as I remember.
During the opening passes there was density energy on the left side like a cloud. On the right it was clear and spatial.
In my new view on the other person, I saw that she would like to have a nice day together with me. She was frustrated. She think that I not respect her.
In the new view of mine I saw, that in the scene before the scene I am not really attentive to the words of my partner. We make an apointment and I think it´s ok. But indeed I am not listening to her complete sentence. I thought about other things. Then in the appointment I am irritated about her complaining. So I complain about her complaint.
In dreaming the new scene I see the beautiful day in autumn. We enjoy it. I ask myself what is it, what she likes to to. And I tell her this question. What would you like to do? Ok, let´s do so. I go down on my knee and say: Sorry about my missunderstaning. What would you like, that I should do? Would you like to have a cake? Yes.
The singing in the group was wonderful. Some time after the class in communication with an pracitioner I felt my voice like a metallic vibration out of my mouth. And I saw this oscillation.
Practicing the pass – I feel like a snake wriggling out of an old skin, very enjoyable…
Tracking – a recent but familiar (i.e. often repeated) scene of disagreement, so thought I’d give it another go. I found that I don’t like to feel written off, but I don’t pay so much attention when I write another off. Seeing things from the other’s perspective I found that it goes both ways. I saw that conversely, if I’m able to give another the space they need to learn and grow, then I also give myself that space. If I’m able to believe in another’s potential I also believe in myself—a better feedback loop to be in! There is starting to be more spaciousness and humor and kindness in general in my interactions with the person in my scene… and more possibilities that I previously didn’t allow myself to see.
A funny thing – during my disagreement scene there were actually cartoon feathered dinosaurs (no kidding!!) jumping around on the TV, right in front of my eyes! I was so upset at the time, that I didn’t even notice. They were joyously shaking their pin feathers and spiky things on their arms/wings and going “shshshsh… shshshsh”, singing about their evolutionary journey. It was like the universe was reminding me in my scene that there are other ways to be. New story, we all get up and laugh, and dance with the dinosaurs! :)
After feeling somewhat muddled for the preceding few weeks, at the end of this class, it was like…yes, I can find my way again! Yes, I can persist! Amazing…Thank you to all of you, for the reference point!
Hello dear readers:
The class did change my story. From the *they did this to me* to *It was me who was asking inappropriate requests from them*, and then I had health problems as a result of making bad decisions, I didn´t feel confident to find my way out and I was putting the responsibility on them. She is a good person and she always has helped me, she just has too many things on her shoulders.
After I wrote this in the class together with the Magical Passes, I was flooded with a joy almost forgotten to it´s existence.
I liked the repetitive quality of the Magical Pass that looked like a staircase, in which every step lead me to where I want to go, every little at a time. It makes a difference in my body position.
Now it is easier to see how negative thoughts of criticism lead me to a feeling of drainage.
I hope to have a little more to say about the tone next time I write.
When we did the preparatory passes in the beginning of classes (before plumed serpent form), there was a moment when i shifted into my night dream from few weeks ago. in a moment I was in the dream scene and in the next moment again in my room doing passes.
The plumed serpent form in this configuration had a very curious effect on me. Very different from previous way. It helped very much to change the view to the situation. I can’t explain, but would like to say “step in and step out”.
Scene was when my business partner was rushing into the room and demanded to see all the documents but was not ready to sit down and talk about it.
I tried to seduce him to calm down and have a seat as all the papers are ready to look through.
In my new view I saw him as a small boy who is scared and panicked and did not know what to do. He needed help.
I left out all my accusations toward him and felt that I can take decision to help him but also understood that I can not take responsibility for him, only for my own doings.
New story.
He is rushing into the room. I ask him to calm down and offering him a cup of tea. I ask him to have a seat and have a talk about the situation. He is having a seat and we will have a talk and find solution.
I repeated to myself the new story several times in this week and visioned myself with him in discussion about solution.
In the moment we did not find the solution yet in real life, but I take one day at a time and vision my new dream where we solve everything.
I did the vibrating tone by doing plumed serpent form and also by driving a car. It took two days with plumed serpent form when I found the tone which resonate with my heart area.
Thank you very much everybody!
Thank you for this “easier” form of the Plumed Serpent and the new possibilitiy for recapitulation! I enjoyed much the calm and profound mood of the magical pass. It was interesting for me to discover that the tone I was singing was the note I always use for tuning my guitar.
My scene: I recently had a call with my former sitar teacher. It dealed with a music project I had offered him before for which I wanted to make music together with him. But he started it own his own and didn’t inform me. I was very angry and dissapointed and told him this on the phone.
When I recapitulated the scene I remembered that years ago I seperated from him as his pupil because I was angry that he didn’t want me to join an event where a very wellknown musician was playing in his appartment. This was the real reason why I still was angry with him!
After doing the Plumed Serpant several times I saw that he did not exclude me from the music project but just tried to keep things going after I had no time to meet him and the co-ordinator of the project. Last week after the web classes I met both and they easily integrated me in the project. After going more deep into the scenes I yesterday met my sitar teacher and told him the “old” story. He even couldn’t remember and said that normally when famous musicians played in his appartment for recording a session they didn’t want anybody else to join. So it was maybe not him that excluded me years ago but the musician and this for a good reason! It was very good to talk to my teacher and tell him what has been on my mind all those years. Now we have the possibility to really work together. It will be interseting to see how things will go on in the future.
Singing my tone gives me calmness and a certain kind of power – a very comfortable feeling. What I feel too is a sudden movement of the assemblage point into a postion of silence. It will be interesting to see how I could further “develop” my tone, maybe together with an instrument.
Thank you again!
Your experiences of the class;
Gee, it was an interesting class wasn’t it! Especially Reni’s wonderful cool and sober, but somehow fun guidance. Especially the silence and neat behaviour of all the practitioners. Especially the instructors.
The practice of The Plumed Serpent form and other Magical Passes;
A pass that makes me want to move all over the earth – the bits with the ssss is like being the rainbow creation serpent who tunnels out the rivers and forms the features of the earth, then rises to the sky-dreaming realm – a greater reality realm.
The tracking of an initial scene of ‘disagreement’ and the turning of it into an entirely different story – one from the perspective of a larger view and a compassionate heart.
This worked well – the gradual movement of the tracking, with the pass being repeated after each stage of examining the scene and bringing it to a new light is proving very effective. I can see the new scene almost immediately as I try and compose it for action when I read it out loud to myself. I feel a shine in my eyes specific to the incident that I can log into my awareness for future activity.
The finding of your own ‘tone’ – one in connection with your dreaming body and Spirit.
A dog friend likes to howl along with me when I practice my ha tones, which makes for a lighthearted start to the day… I find myself hahaha-ing all the way to work! Its certainly a quick connnection to my other self and its doings. How quickly I move from prisoner to bird!
Of your explorations of reading/saying to yourself – your new view of the other person in your scene, yourself and your new story – at least once a day, and then your observations of how this ‘new story’ altered your mood and follow-up interactions with this person.
Sorry, but I have been a unable to follow this up as much as I’d like, due to heavy work commitments. But I have been following the thread started in the class in relation to a particular person during brief ‘gaps’ in my days: an expansive breath with my arms of certain scenes; a revisit of the initial scene to see what I’ve missed (in regard to a disagreement on our coming marriage). More work for sure to come on this though.
And how singing your ‘tone’ to yourself or out loud daily, in times of peace and in times when a broader view was needed, gave you a new perspective.
I more hum than ha – out of habit – and concentrating in deliberating ha-ing when I least expect is a good exercise for bringing myself into the realm of silence and creation.
Добрый день, дорогой Cleargreen!
Спасибо за чудесную практику, за ваше безупречное намерение, помогающее всем нам на нашем пути.
Форма пернатого змея стала значительно проще для запоминания.
Ощущения после неё – глубокая внутренняя тишина и укорененность.
Очень понравилась «разминочная» часть с закрытыми глазами. так глубже ощущаются микродвижения внутренние, мышцы и сухожилия, которые обычно не осознаются.
После пасса «набрасывания энергии» тело само сделало следующее движение – разворот ступни влево. Это было одно из движений, сопутствутствующих новому взгляду в одной из последних практик свидетеля и часто это движение у меня «само» выполняется.
В первой сцене «несогласия» я увидела из нового взгляда, что у меня был выбор жалеть себя и возмущаться или же отстраниться от ситуации, быть наблюдателем. Этот выбор я проигнорировала, последовав за шаблоном. Был момент осознанности, в который я могла все изменить. Я очень жалела себя, в связи с тем, что мне придется снова посетить эту неприятную контору, потеряв столь драгоценное время и душевное спокойствие.
С восприятием из расширенного взгляда я увидела, что женщина по ту сторону окошечка (в налоговой инспекции) – не олицетворение системы, а живой человек.
Вспоминая сцену, я увидела, что она была более свободна и осознанна в этой сцене, чем я. И вообще, на своём рабочем месте она играет свою роль отстраненно. Может быть, вся налоговая система и её работа в тч ей гораздо больше надоели, чем мне.
Новый взгляд мой был: потеря времени – это потеря осознанности. Все равно, чем я занимаюсь – медитациями или бухгалтерией. Все равно, нравится мне это зание или нет. Если я сохраняю осознанность и остаюсь «наблюдателем» – время проходит продуктивно.
С этим новым взглядом я решила сдать отчет пораньше, не тянуть до последнего дня.
Был шанс испытать новый взгляд – я снова записала информацию на флэшку некорректно, итого за неделю я дважды съездила в налоговую и дважды в пенсионный фонд. Все отчеты были сданы уже в среду. Поездки не вызывали ни малейшего внутреннего дискомфорта. В ПФ мне даже пришлось напрягаться, что б сделать серьёзное лицо и прекратить ржать, так как я была с другом и мы обсуждали по дороге что то смешное.
Новый взгляд помогал мне по-другому относиться к выполнению ежедневных действий, которые принято называть рутиной и получать от них истинное удовольствие.
Пение музыки вслух сработало само и очень мне помогло. Я приболела, но решила не жалеть себя и не откладывать важных дел. Когда я выходила из дома, телу хотелось полежать отдохнуть, что б его полечили. Я сказала ему, что все равно идти надо. Тогда оно попросила разрешения повыть . После вытья стало легче, и всю дорогу в маршрутке я тихонько пела. Потом я уже и не помнила, как чувствовала себя выходя из дома. Просто делала то, что было надо.
Что это как то связано с опытом, полученном на вебексе, я подумала аж вечером.
Написание отзыва напомнило мне о новом взгляде, как раз очень вовремя!
Спасибо от души!
Thank you very much for the new forms you showed us and for yet another type of recapitulation which can be done alone.
My scene of disagreement was with a friend in a restaurant. She is also a friend of another friend of mine, and the two of them are having problems with each other for some time now. They had met a few days before, and my other friend had told me that it was a good meeting and that they had sorted out some things and others not.
When A. told me that they had met, I said: „I know that you’ve met, M. already told me something about it.“
A. said: „Ah… and what did she tell you?“
I felt a little bit uncomfortable and summarized some of the things that M. had told me and of which I knew that M. wouldn’t mind me telling them to A.
A’s gaze became examining and somewhat cold: „And she didn’t tell you more?“
I said: „Well, this is what I can tell you, I can’t tell you everything she said just like I wouldn’t tell her everything you told me….“
She said accusingly: „But how do you know what you can tell and what you can’t? I think, this is very strange and I feel excluded if you act like this….“.
By then, I felt very uncomfortable. My chest jumped inwardly with fright, I tried to appear relaxed but my face was getting sort of rigid, my breathing was shallow, my shoulders were hoisted attentively, I fixed her face trying to understand what will come next, my upper body was slightly bent forward, my inner dialogue was „I didn’t do anything wrong!“, I felt wrongfully accused because I had only tried to be honest with her and had thought that I could be a good friend to both of them by being supportive and listening to both of them, while taking my own position towards the problems they have. Inner dialogue: „I can only act the way I feel is right!“.
We had a discussion afterwards and went home sorry, sad, disappointed, angry….
After the first exercise I recognized that I have difficulties to remain calm when someone feels hurt by my behavior even if I am convinced that I acted ok. I did not really acknowledge her feelings and the difficult situation we are in. I could have reassured her that I didn’t intend to exclude her at all, on the contrary.
After the second exercise I recognized that I can simply acknowledge that she is hurt, without having to defend myself. I can stay calm and confident and let her know my thoughts. I want to be able to act honestly without debasing myself so that others can feel comfortable.
After the third exercise I realized that we both felt small and alone in our way and that I also had felt a little bit angry with her because she demanded my complete loyalty only to her, which had made me react in a cold way.
In my new story I meet A. and when she tells me that she has met with M., I remain calm and relaxed because I know that I am no part of their problem. I say: Yes, I heard from M. that you both met, I am really curious what you have to tell. How do you feel after having met her?
During the week I found out another aspect: I reacted with fear because I was afraid of losing A’s friendship. But in the end I am not dependent from A and the disagreement with her is not really important. I feel a little more distanced, sober, and prefer to concentrate on the positive things in my life and on my wellbeing.
I sang a lot during this week, not only during the exercise of the plumed serpent form. I found out that I want to start playing guitar and singing along with it.
The plumed serpent form allows me to look at situations from different angles, but also with more distance, with more sobriety, just like flying in the sky…
Thank you very much for this wonderfull kind of recapitulation!
The Plumed Serpent form as well as the introductory movements have a very concentrative and focussing effect through which I can reach inner silence very quickly.
Old scene: I was approx. 10 years old and playing soccer in my team was the most important thing in my life, but I had many problems in school. One evening, my father announced to me that from now on I would be prohibited from playing soccer. It felt as if the world collapsed on me, and I cried, screamed and raged so much that my father revoked the prohibition and life went on as usual for me.
During stalking I recognized my father’s powerlessness and that for him this prohibition was the last resort to solve my problematic situation. My own chaos became clear, and that I was completely unable to cope with it.
New scene: I say to my father: You are right, I have to change something, I need to better organize my time. Because I want to continue playing soccer but also want to accomplish my duties properly. I will prepare a timetable.
The new scene has a very soothing effect on me, I feel that my life has become more structured and harmonious.
I can arrange/organize my life according to my ideas.
I also understand my father now: he just was at a loss and actually wanted to help me.
When singing my tone, I feel my silent, wide and deep side. The tone gives me serenity and softness.
Dear Cleargreen!
After this Class i became more loving people. And when I singing my “tone” this feeling expanding more and more!
With Affection!
I liked the new Quetzalcoatl movement very well, especially the movements of the right side, because my spine feel so relaxed here. The class has shown me that it goes on and everything is interconnected. I was particularly evident in the singing of our common A at the end.
The scene was a morning awakening. My girlfriend wanted to have breakfast immediately after waking up and drove me. I was annoyed and went on a collision course. After I told this story differently, I thought how nice it could be if only my ego would not hurt them as quickly or be frightened of losing control. That the stories I tell in my dreams have impact. This has shown me a dream next night. I was paralyzed and I saw a threat from which I could not escape. In an attempt to scream, I woke up and was glad of awakening. The day after I read my new story and perspectives through. I realized that I could not always avoid our armed or wanted. But it took me to a specific situation with my girlfriend after a fight. She complained about me and I listened very attentively. She had many things really right with what she said. For example, I realized how I try and manipulate others, instead of letting them like they are. Or how much I mean by often unexamined judgments, my girlfriend made life difficult. The conversation was a very healing effect on us. She feels seen and understood and I’m not seem so delivered. As my singing had often pressed something, as something I would tie up the throat. The tone has now changed somewhat. It is lighter and more free, because my neck now feels more relaxed when singing. I’m curious how it goes on.
Hmm…at last I feel that I can offer a vaguely coherent account of a fragment of my recent post-workshop experiences. I failed to attend the recent on-line workshop due to, for the second time, a death in the family. The last time was 12 years ago when I received news of the death of my mother on the eve of a California workshop.
At the Berlin workshop I was moved by Nyei’s remarkably vibrant enactment of the weight of ancestral expectation, whilst speaking of the realm of creation myths: it took 2 days for that vibration to emerge as conscious thoughts, when in the company of my son, whilst on a walk in a magically lit forest- My life was saved 2 days before I was to move into my new home. My father died 2 days before he was to move to his new home. The date of my “rescue” was the anniversary of the death of my mother. She died 3 months after the death of my father; my son had his life saved 3 months after I survived.
Nyei spoke of the continuation, fulfilment and breaking of family traditions.
Have I broken a tradition? Or rearranged it? The timings suggest that I have not broken it…or? Life…death. Hmm…
Do deaths in my family as I approach a “path” I value suggest…? Hmm…
Don’t know if verbal answers are sufficient here.
On another note, I must thank Geri for her Navajo creation myths (let alone her ruthlessly honest personal history). I must confess to have found myself embracing the imagery of the Fool from the A.E.Waite tarot deck as a pretty accurate depiction of me. Not quite the wannabe-smart-ass-know-it-all I seem to have wanted to be.
And to finish this blah, another confession: I love doing the “Wheel of time”. All of it. The “Plumed Serpent” on the other hand has me in discomfort, albeit of a very giggly kind. Doing the right hand slithering movements has my internal “high priest of moral and ethical incorruptability” squirming in disquiet: a whole gallery in the court of mes are giggling and smirking, courteously behind hands over their mouths, whilst the majority silently observe, although they do seem to veer towards a smile.
Thank you Cleargeen. All of you.
I oblige a request for an acupuncture treatment for my younger brother. After I insert the needles he opens up about how happy he is the way things are going in our band. A touchy subject for me, I reply that I’m not so happy the way things have been. This makes us both feel upset and it descends into criticisms, argument and anger. My chest feels crumpled and sad. ‘He won’t listen’. I can’t breathe properly. I get very angry, swear and kick and object in the room. I storm out wildly, leaving the acupuncture needles in!
My internal dialogue about my brother is that he doesn’t listen, has no respect, loyalty and is selfish. My internal dialogue about myself is that I feel ripped off, stifled and used as a scapegoat.
After the plumed serpent form: I see that he was trying to express something positive and got annoyed at my negativity. I see that I was worn out and frustrated but that I was doing something good in action where I could have let go and been more accepting.
Again after the form: My chest physically feels much more ‘square’ in shape, open and calm. I get as sense of a light blue light in my chest. My story about my brother is that he wasn’t really equipped with the communication skills rather than having ill will towards me. My story about myself is that I expected people to always listen to me but didn’t speak very well myself and was too intense about things.
The new story: I give my brother acupuncture. He brings up how he’s feeling good about things. I listen and reaffirm his positive feelings (after all I’m trying to help him). I say ‘relax and feel the needles, stay feeling positive’. I take the opportunity to examine why I’m feeling frustrated. I ask myself how I can use such a situation to practice adapting my actions rather than trying to change theirs.
Thanks for the class, the recapitulation was confronting but left me feeling more open and happy. Humming the tone seemed to clean and focus awareness into the body. Again the sensation of light blue light was quite pleasant.